An Update and a Vacay

Date: Sunday June 9th 2019 Starting at 8:35 am

     So it is finally here! I'm officially on vacation from work and have been since Friday at 3:00 pm. Awesome! That's enough, right? Nooope! I'm also just a little over 24 hours away from getting on a plane and going to Washington DC. Sounds great, right? NOT DONE YET! Once in DC I, and my cousin, will be waiting about an hour and then taking another plane to HAWAII! Yussss!!! I'm taking an actual vacation! A real one and a very big one!

     We've got so many plans for this trip and it's gonna be so great to get away and enjoy all that Hawaii has to offer us.  We'll be visiting Waikiki Beach (where Kurt Cobain was married among other awesome things), we'll be swimming with sharks, seeing the Pearl Harbor Memorial and so much more that I can hardly wait to experience. Two friends and I will have so much video and so many pictures from the next two weeks; I'm so excited to just be somewhere else, somewhere so different from all I'd ever experienced in my life.

     No for my current life situation: Yesterday I found out I'm going to be moving today. Not far and it's a guaranteed place to go so that's a good thing, although it's not exactly the best possible situation. I'm gonna try to make the best of it. I need to get a portable air conditioner and a new couch, bed and figure out a way to get my projector screen hung in a concrete basement. The "projector life" has been really eye opening for me and I don't want to lose that but I'm gonna have to get real creative with it at the new place.

     It's been very surreal for the last year and a half, I've lived at my current residence with my landlord since November 2017 though I was supposed to be here for two weeks. My landlord reminds me of my Uncle so much that at times while I was living in his home, I forgot it wasn't Uncle Mike for moments. It's wild! His mannerisms and his life structure and the words he uses and his generosity, they are all reminiscent of the only man I've ever truly seen as "family" (not including my cousin since it's kind of recent that he's been so important to my life. Recent being within 7 or 8 years out of my 37 years of life so far)

     So it's pretty bittersweet not living with him anymore and not getting to see and play with his dog anymore and adding that I've spent a year building my room into a nearly perfect theater/place to record videos/stay cool, it's going to take some time to fix this new place up. And I know I probably sound negative about this, I am excited to have to be creative with some things and have a definite place (for a little bit cheaper too), this isn't too too bad of a situation.

     The last thing that's been a big focus for me lately is my upcoming Youtube channel revamp. If you'll notice, I'm using a new picture at the top of this diary entry, one that says "Journey of LIFE"
I'm very very excited to be currently working on episodes, I have been forming what I think is a great new idea for a little while now. I have a structure that I hope people like and watch and it is my way of giving back to this sometimes too negative universe.


     A little about "Journey of LIFE:

We all have a story, fantastic experiences that should be known and shared. Sometimes it's because we need help, sometimes one story can encourage someone else or lets someone else know they're not alone in a way, sometimes we need to be uplifted by a success story or even the chance to help someone who we can help in some way. My hope is through me learning about new things and hearing from people who have stories that people watching will be encouraged to keep going and continue to create their own great story.

     In wanting to encompass a wide array of  what life has to offer, I'm going to have a format that brings you a different topic every week.

-the first week will be focused on discussion/debate. I plan to open up my mind by testing my own beliefs at times and just hearing someone else's personal journey. I'm excited to find out what people have been through and how they were able to get to where they are today!

-the second week of every month will showcase a pop culture themed episode. From movie reviews to music conversation and news to art and artistic history to short films and actors; this one is going to be great since I'm eager to bring my version of imagination to the world, hopefully you like it.

-the third week will mainly a personal look into my life. I'll be posting v logs there and potentially sharing guests' personal struggles/triumphs.

-And the 4th week will be dedicated to activities, athletics and active projects.

Through all of this, I hope viewers learn a little something or are encouraged and maybe laugh a little here and there. That was a shameless plug but it's what I've been planning and working on lately that I'm really excited about.

There will be a part 2 to this...can't make any promises of when but there will be.

To be continued...

A New Chapter, A New Beginning

     So...I am entering a new chapter in my life and it's scary, interesting, terrifying and about a hundred other adjectives. What? You wanna know what led me into a new direction that will undoubtedly change the course of my entire life and being? Well, since you asked nicely: alriiiight.

Let me take you back in time not too long ago but just long enough to explain things.

     Imagine, if you will, a trans girl (biological male, for those of you who can't get past that fact. Yes I can admit that fact about myself, and yes I will be referring to myself as a trans girl. Deal with it) who works a retail job. Are you imagining it? Good, gold star for listening.

Now imagine that trans girl having issues with the position she's been placed in and rationally making it very clear to powers that be; Imagine she works very hard to make customers happy and also acknowledges that she has some issues that she needs to be better at (and is trying, successful or not...trying).

Stay with me, imagine that this trans girl has a few issues with customers who accused her of things that she did not do and the powers that be didn't even listen for a second to her side and made up their minds that she was guilty of these ridiculous claims before attempting (in the most fake and absurd manner) to get her side of said issues. And now visualize that this trans girl takes verbal rebuke. And then maybe two or three weeks later she has one more issue with a customer and the same result occurs.

At that point, trans retail worker starts trying harder to make it clear to the powers that be that she needs to be in another position, not by complaining or being rude to customers even though they are relentless at that imaginary retail place of business, but she jumps on the opportunity whenever she gets to do other positions so well that coworkers and other bosses take notice at just how good she did. So her attempts go noticed and powers that be say, "We'll get you off (the worst position that you're having trouble with) and get you in the position that you excel highly in."

A very happy trans girl takes those words to heart and when she doesn't get that position change, she tries to stay calm and thinks, "Okay, eventually (powers that be) will live up to their words and put me in other positions." and she happily continues in the worst position; the position that she has had issues with both from customers creating problems and through her having some trouble with her attitude/limit to being verbally treated very badly.

She tries to keep her head up and be positive even though weeks go by with powers that be not doing what they said...and then...a thing happens (or so she's told) that pushes trans girl to the very edge of her limits. A customer (it still has yet to be proven that this customer exists, but I digress) says they won't come to the particular retail store because of this talked about trans girl; it is said by the powers that be that trans girl "refused" to give this alleged customer something that trans girl has NO REASON to refuse, nor has trans girl EVER refused any customer ever.

In fact, trans girl takes offense to this claim because she takes great pride in giving customers the exact thing she was accused of "refusing" Upon being approached by the powers that be, she was not given the respect of being listened to when asked why she "refused" to give the customer certain service. Trans girl had taken the verbal punishment before and held back as much as she had in her but this, boys and girls reading this, was quickly nearing a breaking point.

So while being told (not asked or given any benefit of the doubt in any way; guilty until...nope, just guilty even though she absolutely wasn't) that she "refused" to give the service that she had never denied, trans girl wasn't able to hold her tongue enough and pushed the powers that be back verbally. She admittedly wasn't polite when told she did things she would never do; imagine trans girl was clearly frustrated beyond what someone should have to take from their powers that be.

Imagine that from that moment on, the powers that be decided to not only take things personal by not speaking to her and doing petty, incredibly odiously rude things like talking about trans girl on social media websites then deleting her (yeah, trans girl was friend requested a while before by one power that be and while still "friends" powers that be posted trash talk about trans girl, specifically mentioning things about her in very childish, rude words)

Along with being treated like less than every other employee by certain powers that be, trans girl's hours went from about 35-37 to 13 in the span of two weeks. That's a very drastic slash in hours and over the next three schedules, those hours went from 13 to 11 down to 7, respectively. So trans girl decides things need to take a GIGANTIC step towards a new chapter in her life...and here we are in the present.

From those powers that be deciding to do everything they can to make her miserable to cutting her hours drastically

     (on more than three different occasions they cut HER hours 

even though other coworkers did blatant things that could 

have deserved having their hours cut, like cursing at 

customers and not showing up for their scheduled shifts 

regularly...but those powers that be didn't show ANY 

bias whatsoever...none. Just sayin)

     I hope you enjoyed my story and I hope it has a happy ending some day in the near future, at least for trans girl...nah, I'm not good at hating on most people so I truly hope the powers that be find a way to be happy too and treat others with respect and dignity in the future. I'm pretty sure that those specific powers that be chose to be exactly that way to trans girl and not to anyone else so maybe by her changing her course of life, she takes their negativity away from them  as much as removing herself from it. I also hope for no harm or bad karma to come to anyone involved.

Prayers, good thoughts and comments are welcome as always, thank you for taking the time to read my words.